Kathleen
broke down in tears when she heard her mother walk out of the room. In
as much as she said those words to her, she knew the pain inside of her.
She felt her whole world was falling apart; the one family she has now
is dying and the worst, she would never enjoy the mother- daughter
relationship.
She hated the emotion she is feeling right now,
like she belonged somewhere. Nothing in her life made any sense for a
long time, but now, she felt something inside of her, something stronger
than the pain and hurt she's always carried with her.
She wanted
to scream out and ask it to stop haunting her. She tried to dismiss
what it meant; this is love, a love she had denied her mother all these
years, a love she tried to suppress with the pain, hurt and guilt. She
realized that somewhere in her heart, she did love her mother; probably
had caged it somewhere far away, but something or someone had let it
out.
Then, she felt angry all over again. They had no right
to do this to her, they have no right to make her feel this way; this is
definitely not what she is made of, this is not who she is. She had
trained herself to be numb to any feelings, in exception to the pain and
hurt she felt.
Then, she concluded this was Collins' fault; he
had told her about love, he caused all this. He opened something in her,
like a part of her she buried a long time ago had suddenly awoken.
Suddenly,
she stood up from the bathroom floor and walked back into the room,
went to her computer and started to type. If he indeed loves someone
like her, then, he should wait until he reads her messages. She is not
someone to be loved, not capable of loving anyone.
She
started to write everything in her life to Collins; started with the
rape, and how she became her step father's mistress; she told him about
her bosses' husband whom she sleeps with from time to time, also about
the various things she had done. After she was done typing, without
hesitation, she hit the send button and went straight to bed.
An
hour later, Kathleen has been tossing and turning in bed, unable to
sleep so she stood up to take her sleeping tablet when she saw the door
open and Paul walked in.
She was startled. "What do you want?" She demanded.
Paul was taken aback at her outburst. Over the years, she had never for once questioned him in such manner.
"What!" he gasped; confused. He looked back to see if he had entered the right room.
"What do you want?" she challenged him again.
He moved towards her. "What do you mean?" he looked confused.
"I
want you out of my room now!" She felt a strong determination and anger
overwhelm her; even though she had not planned to stop him or even
thought about it but something in her made her snap.
"I just
got back from Port Harcourt and thought to spend the night here," he
walked towards her. "Your mother is fast asleep and doesn't even know
I'm back." He started to unbutton his shirt.
"So?" she looked angrily into his eyes.
"So,
let's get down to business; I will leave very early in the morning
before she wakes up and pretend I just got back." He let out a wicked
smile.
Kathleen rubbed her hands against her face in frustration.
"Paul!" she shouted to get his attention. "I want you out of my room now
and out of my life!"
Paul startled as he looked as if he was just woken up from a deep sleep. "What has come over you?"
Kathleen's
anger rose within her as she felt like going to kick him out of her
room. "Nothing has come over me!" she raged out. "I'm doing something I
should have done years ago."
"So, you suddenly woke up one day and decided to do this?" he asked smirking.
Her breathing became rapid and shallow; even the thought of him standing there repulsed her. "I said I'm done!" she shouted.
After
the rape few years ago, which became a constant affair between them,
even under the same roof as her mother, his wife; she had never rejected
him or even said anything to him. All she did is allow him on top of
her and have sex with her, after he is done, he just takes his leave and
this has continued all these years.
"You can't be serious." He roared out in anger.
"Something
I should have done many years ago; I should have ...…" she looked
around her room for something, and then found a scissors on her dressing
table; she picked it up and pointed towards him. "I should have ripped
your heart from your disgusting body all these years, I should have done
something on the very first day you forced your self on me; you raped
me and destroyed me right from that day." She screamed out with streams
of tears running down her cheeks.
"I should never have allowed
you touch me after that; I should never have done all the things I did.
You made me into this disgusting person that I can barely look at my
self without being sick in the stomach." She walked towards him and
faced him squarely.
Paul stood there dog-smacked staring back at her, and then all of a sudden, he roared out in laughter.
"You enjoyed everything!" he laughed out, almost like a joke to him.
Kathleen
couldn't believe this. The man has no iota of emotion in him; he is a
man that she should have killed a long time ago but instead, she allowed
him destroy everything in her. She became more furious staring at him;
not even a sign of remorse.
"You Pig!" she screamed out in tears. "Bastard!" her jaws tightened in disgust; her heart pounds in anger.
"To
think my mother loved you despite all these; she took you in and gave
you everything you ever wanted; you stole from her, you destroyed her
daughter's love and you were never there for her. Do you even know she
is dying?" she asked wearily. "Of course, you do." Sadness filled her.
"You are merely waiting around to get what's left of her when she's
gone, isn't it?" She screamed at him.
Paul was tongue-tied as he stared back at her.
"God!
I have been such a fool; I have destroyed everything." She leaned
against the wall, unable to stand as the hot tears that clouded her eyes
began rolling down her cheeks.
"I can see you've got your
big mouth back," He scoffed at her. "This reminds me of a certain
fourteen years old girl, who thought she had it all but later became the
very thing she despised." He growled at her.
"You Bastard!"
Kathleen raged, walking towards him with the scissors pointed at him.
Paul immediately walked towards the door, opened it to escape but found
Sophie standing there, drenched in tears.
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